My first spoken-word poem.

Note: I wrote this a few months ago for a talent showcase. After listening to many spoken-word poems, this was my first foray into the genre. Obviously, it is not perfect, and I may be making changes to it in the future or making it longer, but I am very proud of it!

Deep breaths, solid ground

Heart slowing its pound

My eyes will not leak tears laced with burning-hot failure

This time.

I will be strong

I will prove you wrong

As soon as I build up my defenses I will hide

So far inside myself that your disapproval will never find me.

If I cry, I let you win.

This is why I never let you in!

If I knew how not to crumble

Like a sandcastle besieged by water,

I would man my fortress

Because, yes,

My being is a castle in need of protection.

I wish I knew how to defend myself from the insults

That pierce the walls I am still building

Or rebuilding, for that matter

Instead I watch the pieces shatter.

The floor is littered with shards of my pride

But despair is not a helpful adhesive.

If I could only be strong

Take the barbs as they come

I am more fragile than society demands

My power is in my hands

And I can’t shield it from the condemnation for long.

So as another battle ends

I stand as tall as I can and

Brace myself for the aftermath

And hope that next time

I will be war-ready

And I will hold fast

And the floor will not be such a mess anymore.

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